Saturday, January 3, 2009

Off to a great start!

Q. Ms. Jones, have you ever given a deposition before?
A. No.
Q. Just to give you the rules, we have a court reporter here who is taking down everything we say, so it's important that we speak in words. Do not nod or shake your head and do not use "uh-huh" or "huh-uh," okay?
A. (Witness nods head).
Q. Ma'am, I need you to answer audibly, okay?
A. Uh-huh.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Yes, I said yes.

Q. Do you know if you signed a verification with respect to this document?

A. Yes.

Q. You did? I can't tell.

A. Yes.

Q. I can't tell if it is, yes, you know, or yes, you did.

A. Yes.

Submitted by: Larissa Walker, scopist

Elmer Fudd

Do you recall weeding -- reading -- weeding -- I sound like Elmer Fudd -- do you recall reading the other testimony in this case?

Submitted by: Julie Thomas, scopist

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Memory like a steel trap...or not.

Q. Okay. Are you currently taking any medications that would impair you to recall events from the past or testify truthfully today?

A. No. I mean, I don't think -- I take medication, but I don't think that will affect my memory. I can't remember what they are, though.

Submitted by: Shawna Ingle

Call the funeral home.

Q So you say your sex drive is decreased since your accident?

A No. It's deceased.

Submitted by: Gina Jackson

I just don't know; I really, really don't. Really!

Q Do you remember ever working at (name omitted)?

A What's the name of the place? I may have. I couldn't remember the name of the place. I don't know. I couldn't remember if that's the name of the place. I couldn't remember the name. I don't know. I don't know if that was the name. I don't remember if that was the name of the place. I don't remember the name. I was thinking it might have been called something else, but I don't remember the name of the place. I really didn't -- just that name --
I guess he really can't remember....

Submitted by: Gina Jackson

Mistranned word...oops!

A. There was a DVD player on special.


Q. So was there a specific one on sale that was

worth getting up and going to the store at 5 a.m. for?


A. I think they advertised some sperm, and my wife

said whatever they were offering had to be better than mine.

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"Sperm" should have been "special" - LOL!!

Submitted by: Stephanie